Rah Times

Loved you as if you cared. Lost you as if you were ever mine. Thinking one day you'll surely, Love and want me a fter I'm gone. Your love's obscure, like an object on the ocean floor,  Til the tide brings it ashore, it's existence obscure invisible 'til it's touch is real. XOXO 💖 A heart throb song Your smile made me want to send you flowers.

Two days before hurricane Harvey I got a report from my neurologist saying I had two benign brain tumors. It took me a few days to process her message and by then hurricane Harvey hit. My house got 6 inches of water in it. A week after the storm a remediation company came and they cut 24 inches of wall throughout my home and cleaned up all the mud that covered the floors. I did my usual wining to my trusted friends, then after that I sent my medical information unto a relative who reviewed the findings. Like real estate in where a tumor is located determines value, location determines the need for swift action. Mine was in the retina canal, millimeters behind the optic nerve. Even noncancerous legions grow and that was the danger I was faced. I got to the Mayo clinic in Rochester Minnesota Wednesday night two weeks ago. On monday last week the tumor was removed. I spent the rest of last week in recovery and the step down unit. Today, I am home and the sheet rock people are her...

All I ever wanted was, your warm embrace. To be comforted by your presence, For my thoughts to not only be a dream. To know not only ponder about your love. I spent precious moment fighting to survive, being unsatisfied, feeling cheated, betrayed, consumed with thoughts of you. You gave to others, took from me, 'til I learned to love me.

No matter how grim life circumstance gets take a minute to reflect on the positive. After Brain surgery followed by gamma radiation two months later, I feel content. I feel far removed from my distress as though I am not lacking anything. I am grateful for the care and support I received though a difficult ordeal. Sweet Spot a song I wrote after reflecting on my emotional highs and low that resulted from my situation, and feeling renewed after feeling empty. For the doctors and nurses who took care of me after brain surgery, I am grateful. For the comfort and reassurance from family and friends, I am thankful. Sweet Spot

I wrote the lyrics to a Song of Thanksgiving at a time when I was facing serious issues. I struggle with issues stemming from autoimmune disease. In addition I have other medical issues that has not been medically treated. It is like these issues has stolen apart of me and rob me of finding joy and contentment in things that should be celebrated.  I feel my illness has held me back from being my best self. I have pretty terrific children and I do for them in order that they are physical cared for but I feel that most of the time my tiredness does not exclude joy, or love. As a young woman I chose to live according to biblical principles and to have faith and to trust God blindly. However, based on the action of some, I felt unloved and rejected by God. I wasn't truly thankful for feeling unfulfilled and pushed aside, but in this song, I wrote that God was a God of second chances. After the musician created the music and produced the song, in my heart I felt that the lyric to ...

When I was young I adored you. then I didn’t know what lacrosse was. But I became a fan because you played. 'Til I found out about the mess you made. The bubble I lived in was short lived. Broken by all you exposed me to. The bubble I lived in became crowded Filled by those you got involved with. Anything you told me, I’d believe. Even your promise to take care of me. As you can see, I’m no longer naïve. ‘N I’ve stopped wearing my heart on my sleeve. If I want flowers, I buy it. When I need an admirer, I write lyrics. Though that may not give me the touch I need. It's better than the nothingness that you give. XOXO Heart Emoji link to a great woo song

I needed you, just not every other night. I loved you the moment we locked eyes. But for me a part-time lover just wasn’t right. That was why I choose another to partner with in life. I wished you stood with me when times got hard. Many days my face was drenched with tears. I had to get pass that on my own. My hopes got shaken by my fears. I know you can only start from where we are. But your indifference was like a hammer. It shattered whatever we had. It’s finished, indifference not love is now our banner. (Relationships have its challenges but no one should ever stick with negative energy.) Love uplifts and if it causes you to lose your best self,  then that love is not for you but someone else. Listen to a songs by Ruth I wish love wasn't like Rocks  , But a little more like clay I wish it were more flexible And not rough in any way. I wish love was always great And that it was good every day.