Triumph in the face of challenges
Life constantly changes from day to day and there is no day that is like the day before. It is a lot easier to do nothing and to give up and be over come by defeat but what joy is there in that? I have had to face numerous challenges as a result of the choices I made in life. They were courageous, foolish noble choices and yes my reward has been bitter sweet. Below is an article I wrote several years ago concerning one of the many hurdles I encountered while caring for my children. In the middle of those challenges, I never fore saw the possibility that we would have overcome some of those struggles. The idea that the time would come where this child would be applying for an athletic scholarship at that point was inconceivable to me . At the end of this blog there is a link to a video. The purpose of the video is to demonstrate her performance to the schools she is interested in attending. For us to have gotten to this moment it was not only necessary for this child to be an excellent athlete but she also had to have the academic performance that would deem her college worthy. There were days in her early years when this would have seem like nothing more than a fantasy. I however, wanted this for her and advocated tirelessly on her behalf in order that she could have academic success.
Thanks to the many who has been here for me, she does.
I fell in love with her the first time I watched her as she pulled away from her foster mother and ran like the wind in the opposite direction. The woman was furious because I was a much younger woman and did not offer to catch the child. What she did not know was that I was enjoying watching her try to catch up with the little tyke. On this day I envisioned the child becoming an Olympian. The mother tucked her under her arms and buckled the kicking screaming child inside her van.
"I hope you can move faster than that, because you will have many days like this," she said sharply. "This child has severe temper tantrums. Getting her to calm down is not an easy task." I chose to ignore her remark. I needed to see that run. The child had unwittingly showed me what she was good at. Knowing that she was a very special person enabled me to be more tolerant of her behavior.
I had chosen four beautiful little girls to become my daughters. The runner was the second of this group. I had met her and her older sister at the church they were attending at that time. She was sitting quietly in the church nursery but her look was not welcoming. We just stared at each other without making a move. I waved to her from the doorway, she did not respond. She eventually warm up to me before the night was over. Her beautiful smile was carved into my mind that very night.
Within a couple weeks my husband, our one-year-old son, and I welcomed our new additions to our home. Anna was three years old at the time of placement. One of my first observations of her was that she communicated by gesturing with her hands. I might have overlooked this had it not been for her two- year- old sister, who was talking in complete sentences and could say just about anything. I was given copies of a psychological assessment of each child. I read Anna's a couple of times before I caught the possible receptive and expressive language deficit.
Children with language handicaps often have difficulty communicating their needs. Small children usually display their frustration by having temper tantrums. As they grow older they find new ways to compensate for their lack of understanding. Anna had indicated to me that she found learning very difficult. Her stature only helped to complicate things. She was much bigger than most children her age, and for this reason more was expected of her. However, the part of the brain that processes language was not as developed as it was in other children.
Receptive Language Deficit is the inability to understand simple language such as, "Give me the toy." A child may respond by giving you a different object as opposed to the one asked for. In Expressive Language Deficit, words cannot be expressed. As a toddler, Anna would talk in two-word phases. As a school-aged child, it takes her several minutes to respond when asked, "What grade are you in?" There are several treatments for receptive and expressive language deficits. These include classroom modification such as seating arrangements and classroom acoustics. Auditory training where the child wears headphones and the classroom teacher wears a micro-phone can be beneficial as well as speech therapy where language-building exercises are utilized to increase the child's language skills.
I called the school district and scheduled a screening for Anna and her older sister. At the testing center I had to fill out several forms before the evaluation process. The girls' hearing and vision were tested. Finally they were screened by the speech pathologist. The school evaluation did not catch Anna’s disability. It was my impression that the director did not take the psychological evaluation seriously. The screening showed results within the normal limits for both girls. I was confused. Unlike her older sister, Anna was obviously not very verbal. Her sister’s psychological testing did not indicate that she had any learning difficulty and she went on to perform very well in school. I had taken both children's psychological testing with me and was certain that the director reviewed them. I was very disappointed and frustrated.
"If the psychological testing shows receptive language deficit, then I certainly did not understand your test results," I commented. She then tried to convince me that they had only done a screening. These results were in the normal range and no further intervention was needed. This was not what I wanted to hear. She quickly realized that there was no convincing me and she agreed to further testing. If I had not insisted, Anna would have fallen through the cracks. She would not have received any therapy through the school district to enhance her learning ability.
An ARD (Admission/Review/Dismissal) meeting was scheduled after the testing in order to review the results. The results were similar to the psychologist's. I was told that I could register her for speech classes; so at age three, Anna started speech therapy. She received therapy once a week for thirty minutes. I noticed a dramatic change in Anna. The temper tantrums lessened. She was not as moody. The therapy enabled her to better communicate her needs. Before the therapy she would point to a cookie and say, "Want that." After the therapy she was able to say, "Can I have a cookie?"
At age four she qualified for pre-K. Pre-K was a big asset and prepared her well for kindergarten. I was concerned that she might begin to struggle in first grade. First grade she made mostly A's and B's. At the beginning of the first grade I told Anna’s teacher about her disability. She in turn gave her a lot of personal time, and the speech therapy continued.
At the beginning of second grade, her teacher presented me with a form. It basically said that Anna was an "At Risk Student." (i.e. at risk for dropping out of school.) I viewed the form as the school labeling her. This upset me greatly, and I refused to sign the form. I said to the teacher, "I do not want her labeled." My instincts kept telling me that more could be done for her. I felt that the label committed my daughter to a future without hope or dreams.
She casually replied, "We are not labeling her; this is so that you are aware. Resources will then be available to her." She explained that end-of- the-year testing had been done. Based on those results, Anna was categorized as "At- risk." I was screaming on the inside! I continually voiced my concerns at every meeting that was held to review her progress. I was reassured that Anna was doing well yet second grade was more of a challenge. My husband gently encouraged me to sign the paper. I did so reluctantly. Speech therapy was the only service she received in second grade even though I had signed the At-risk form.
Through out second grade it took Anna an enormous amount of time to grasp concepts taught in class. Her teacher would re-teach her with a small number of other children. In addition, I was committed to spending one-on-one time reinforcing what she learned in school. She made A's and B's along with a couple C's. I was very satisfied with her performance, until I received a cognitive ability testing sent home by the school. My heart sank! As I reviewed the testing result, I realized the testing result contradicted her school grades. I requested an ARD meeting with the hope of getting further testing to clarify the discrepancy. Her grades put her at a higher level of functioning. The cognitive ability testing put her at a lower level. The committee denied further testing because her grades were mostly A's and B's. I was confused. Why would the school spend time, money, and effort on expensive cognitive testing and then choose to ignore the result? I was surprised and disappointed by the school system's lack of ability to analyze the data set before them. A cognitive ability testing is normally used to determine a student's future performance. This cookie-cutter approach was drowning my child. I decided to take matters in to my own hands.
That summer I arranged for a Neuro-psychologist to do a complete battery of tests on her! The evaluation was paid for by medical insurance provided by the state. I was saddened by the results. The testing revealed Anna to have weakness in auditory processing skills, oral vocabulary, and listening and sequential thinking. Auditory processing is the ability to process and recognize speech at a natural speed. Hence her listening comprehension was significantly below average. Armed with these, I finally held the answers to overcome her learning difficulties.
I was very encouraged as I requested another ARD meeting. I was certain she was going to be granted remedial classes. To my amazement the school diagnostician informed me that in her opinion, the test results was not that bad. Her new third grade teacher supported the diagnostician.
"Anna is doing very well in class. As a matter of fact," she said, "she is about somewhere in the middle when compared to the class as a whole." I thought, "This is really frightening! If Anna was median in her class and mediocre is good, I shudder to think about the rest of the children. Here is a child with a documented learning disability. How can they say she is in the middle of the class? Does that mean that fifty percent of the class has a disability, or is my expectation much higher than that of the counselors and teachers?"
With no real support from any of her educators, I concluded that they did not fully understand my child's disability. Speech therapy remained an integral part of her curriculum. As per the end of the year IEP (Individual Transitional Plan), she would be given access to the resource teacher for complete mastery of curriculum. In a couple of weeks she would be invited to attend tutorials. Her teacher told me that Anna performed better on her end-of-the-year TAAS (Texas Academic Assessment Skills) than the other children who qualified for tutorials. I signed the IEP agreeing to the plan.
At the end of the first six weeks of third grade, a parent-teacher meeting was held to discuss her progress. Her grades were B's and C's. Her teacher indicated to me that the only reason they were, was because Anna would typically be given a second chance to take the test. She would then bump her grades up.
"Anna cannot stay on task," she said. "She keeps interrupting herself. The smallest amount of noise in the classroom distracts her. When I tell her to sit down and go over the work, she goes to her seat and looks in her desk or around the classroom. Then she brings her work back to me without having looked it over. On the other hand, if I sit down with her and go through the steps, she is able to do the work. She appears to be displaying characteristics of ADHD (attention deficit hyperactive disorder). If you put her on the medication, her grades would likely improve."
"I guess you did not get a chance to review her psychological report," I said. "She did not meet the ADHD criteria. Receptive Language Deficit means she does not receive language. In other words, she does not understand what you are saying."
"You do not have to have the same type of testing. Your pediatrician can do the evaluation. The testing can be done through the school, but it is a much lengthier process," was her reply.
My child's disability had been explained thoroughly to me. I felt that I pretty much understood it. At this point, I became even more convinced that this language disability was not completely understood.
According to the literature I have read, children with language disability may exhibit behavioral problems such as being disruptive to self and/or others, and they may appear to be inattentive and have problems remembering oral instruction. Generally, their performance is poor in a noisy environment, and they require more time to process information. Academically they have difficulty with reading, comprehension, spelling and vocabulary.
As a concerned parent, I wanted to do what was best for my child. The thought of medicating her bothered me terribly. I knew that stimulants were very effective in treating attention deficit. I was not fully convinced that Anna had ADHD in addition to language disability. At home I could count on her to complete her chores without having to remind her. She frequently offered to help her younger siblings and myself intuitively. I nonetheless went on-line to research the effects of stimulants on children. I was not happy to learn that according to the American Pediatric Association, the medication can affect the growth of children. Anna continues to blossom into a very gifted athlete and is extremely tall for her age. This is an asset and all a part of the gift that she was given. I could in no way take this away from her. I firmly believed that she will need to utilize her athletic gift when selecting a career. The present objective is to find and make available to her the resources that will enable her to overcome her present hurdle.
Through my research I discovered that some physical illnesses and learning disabilities had to be ruled out prior to making an ADHD diagnosis. With this in mind I took her to the pediatrician with the hope that she might reassure me that Anna's problem was related exclusively to language difficulty and not ADHD. I gave the pediatrician a copy of the psychological report which she reviewed. She asked Anna what she thought was going on. Anna shrugged her shoulder indicating she did not know.
The doctor turned to me and asked, "Well what are your thoughts, Mom?"
Trying to get away from making the decision I replied, "Well she does have allergies which have never been treated."
"You have a valid point," she said. "Let’s treat her allergies and see if it will make a difference."
She had been on the allergy medication for several weeks and continued to struggle. Still filled with uncertainty, I started her on stimulants. The stimulants did not change or improve her attention span or her distractibility. I had her re-tested with an independent speech pathologist. The result confirmed the auditory processing difficulty. I shared the test results with her school. New goals were added to her IEP. The school diagnostician had however missed the auditory processing difficulty.
When it became clear that Anna had not made any academic progress in third grade; after her teacher had tutored her for several weeks, another ARD meeting was held. At this meeting it was finally decided that further testing needed to be done. Through this process I realized that the school continued to evaluate her language ability. Her auditory processing skills had never been evaluated by the school. Although some consideration had been given to the documentation I presented, these results were repeatedly over-looked.
Anna knows that I think she is special and that my dream is to one day see her at the Olympics. Presently she needs me to carry the torch for her until she is mentally and physically able to carry it herself.
Parents need to educate themselves about any disability their children may have. A complete psychological assessment helps to rule out the possibility of co-existing disorders. Teacher may not always be accurate in their assessment of their students. It is very important however, for parents to listen to teachers. A child may exhibit behaviors at school that he/she may not exhibit at home. It is absolutely possible for a child to have a language disorder and ADHD. Prior to an ADHD diagnosis the language disorder has to be ruled out. Teachers can make recommendations, but the final decision should be that of a medical professional.
After obtaining the report from the speech pathologist for Anna, I was able to get her the services she needed from the school. The speech pathologist clearly listed Anna’s strengths, weakness and interventions needed to help educate her. We also got her additional speech therapy with this speech pathologist. She was able to have a very successful year. At the end of the year TAAS exams (Texas Assessment of Academic skill) Anna earned an 89% in math and 85% in Reading.
The link below is of Anna's Shot-put performance. She plays on her school's varsity basketball team, She plays golf with the first tee of Houston, holds the Shot-put throwing record for her school and once held the record for the district 400 meters.
Anna's Athletic Ability/ Shot put performance
Thanks to the many who has been here for me, she does.
I fell in love with her the first time I watched her as she pulled away from her foster mother and ran like the wind in the opposite direction. The woman was furious because I was a much younger woman and did not offer to catch the child. What she did not know was that I was enjoying watching her try to catch up with the little tyke. On this day I envisioned the child becoming an Olympian. The mother tucked her under her arms and buckled the kicking screaming child inside her van.
"I hope you can move faster than that, because you will have many days like this," she said sharply. "This child has severe temper tantrums. Getting her to calm down is not an easy task." I chose to ignore her remark. I needed to see that run. The child had unwittingly showed me what she was good at. Knowing that she was a very special person enabled me to be more tolerant of her behavior.
I had chosen four beautiful little girls to become my daughters. The runner was the second of this group. I had met her and her older sister at the church they were attending at that time. She was sitting quietly in the church nursery but her look was not welcoming. We just stared at each other without making a move. I waved to her from the doorway, she did not respond. She eventually warm up to me before the night was over. Her beautiful smile was carved into my mind that very night.
Within a couple weeks my husband, our one-year-old son, and I welcomed our new additions to our home. Anna was three years old at the time of placement. One of my first observations of her was that she communicated by gesturing with her hands. I might have overlooked this had it not been for her two- year- old sister, who was talking in complete sentences and could say just about anything. I was given copies of a psychological assessment of each child. I read Anna's a couple of times before I caught the possible receptive and expressive language deficit.
Children with language handicaps often have difficulty communicating their needs. Small children usually display their frustration by having temper tantrums. As they grow older they find new ways to compensate for their lack of understanding. Anna had indicated to me that she found learning very difficult. Her stature only helped to complicate things. She was much bigger than most children her age, and for this reason more was expected of her. However, the part of the brain that processes language was not as developed as it was in other children.
Receptive Language Deficit is the inability to understand simple language such as, "Give me the toy." A child may respond by giving you a different object as opposed to the one asked for. In Expressive Language Deficit, words cannot be expressed. As a toddler, Anna would talk in two-word phases. As a school-aged child, it takes her several minutes to respond when asked, "What grade are you in?" There are several treatments for receptive and expressive language deficits. These include classroom modification such as seating arrangements and classroom acoustics. Auditory training where the child wears headphones and the classroom teacher wears a micro-phone can be beneficial as well as speech therapy where language-building exercises are utilized to increase the child's language skills.
I called the school district and scheduled a screening for Anna and her older sister. At the testing center I had to fill out several forms before the evaluation process. The girls' hearing and vision were tested. Finally they were screened by the speech pathologist. The school evaluation did not catch Anna’s disability. It was my impression that the director did not take the psychological evaluation seriously. The screening showed results within the normal limits for both girls. I was confused. Unlike her older sister, Anna was obviously not very verbal. Her sister’s psychological testing did not indicate that she had any learning difficulty and she went on to perform very well in school. I had taken both children's psychological testing with me and was certain that the director reviewed them. I was very disappointed and frustrated.
"If the psychological testing shows receptive language deficit, then I certainly did not understand your test results," I commented. She then tried to convince me that they had only done a screening. These results were in the normal range and no further intervention was needed. This was not what I wanted to hear. She quickly realized that there was no convincing me and she agreed to further testing. If I had not insisted, Anna would have fallen through the cracks. She would not have received any therapy through the school district to enhance her learning ability.
An ARD (Admission/Review/Dismissal) meeting was scheduled after the testing in order to review the results. The results were similar to the psychologist's. I was told that I could register her for speech classes; so at age three, Anna started speech therapy. She received therapy once a week for thirty minutes. I noticed a dramatic change in Anna. The temper tantrums lessened. She was not as moody. The therapy enabled her to better communicate her needs. Before the therapy she would point to a cookie and say, "Want that." After the therapy she was able to say, "Can I have a cookie?"
At age four she qualified for pre-K. Pre-K was a big asset and prepared her well for kindergarten. I was concerned that she might begin to struggle in first grade. First grade she made mostly A's and B's. At the beginning of the first grade I told Anna’s teacher about her disability. She in turn gave her a lot of personal time, and the speech therapy continued.
At the beginning of second grade, her teacher presented me with a form. It basically said that Anna was an "At Risk Student." (i.e. at risk for dropping out of school.) I viewed the form as the school labeling her. This upset me greatly, and I refused to sign the form. I said to the teacher, "I do not want her labeled." My instincts kept telling me that more could be done for her. I felt that the label committed my daughter to a future without hope or dreams.
She casually replied, "We are not labeling her; this is so that you are aware. Resources will then be available to her." She explained that end-of- the-year testing had been done. Based on those results, Anna was categorized as "At- risk." I was screaming on the inside! I continually voiced my concerns at every meeting that was held to review her progress. I was reassured that Anna was doing well yet second grade was more of a challenge. My husband gently encouraged me to sign the paper. I did so reluctantly. Speech therapy was the only service she received in second grade even though I had signed the At-risk form.
Through out second grade it took Anna an enormous amount of time to grasp concepts taught in class. Her teacher would re-teach her with a small number of other children. In addition, I was committed to spending one-on-one time reinforcing what she learned in school. She made A's and B's along with a couple C's. I was very satisfied with her performance, until I received a cognitive ability testing sent home by the school. My heart sank! As I reviewed the testing result, I realized the testing result contradicted her school grades. I requested an ARD meeting with the hope of getting further testing to clarify the discrepancy. Her grades put her at a higher level of functioning. The cognitive ability testing put her at a lower level. The committee denied further testing because her grades were mostly A's and B's. I was confused. Why would the school spend time, money, and effort on expensive cognitive testing and then choose to ignore the result? I was surprised and disappointed by the school system's lack of ability to analyze the data set before them. A cognitive ability testing is normally used to determine a student's future performance. This cookie-cutter approach was drowning my child. I decided to take matters in to my own hands.
That summer I arranged for a Neuro-psychologist to do a complete battery of tests on her! The evaluation was paid for by medical insurance provided by the state. I was saddened by the results. The testing revealed Anna to have weakness in auditory processing skills, oral vocabulary, and listening and sequential thinking. Auditory processing is the ability to process and recognize speech at a natural speed. Hence her listening comprehension was significantly below average. Armed with these, I finally held the answers to overcome her learning difficulties.
I was very encouraged as I requested another ARD meeting. I was certain she was going to be granted remedial classes. To my amazement the school diagnostician informed me that in her opinion, the test results was not that bad. Her new third grade teacher supported the diagnostician.
"Anna is doing very well in class. As a matter of fact," she said, "she is about somewhere in the middle when compared to the class as a whole." I thought, "This is really frightening! If Anna was median in her class and mediocre is good, I shudder to think about the rest of the children. Here is a child with a documented learning disability. How can they say she is in the middle of the class? Does that mean that fifty percent of the class has a disability, or is my expectation much higher than that of the counselors and teachers?"
With no real support from any of her educators, I concluded that they did not fully understand my child's disability. Speech therapy remained an integral part of her curriculum. As per the end of the year IEP (Individual Transitional Plan), she would be given access to the resource teacher for complete mastery of curriculum. In a couple of weeks she would be invited to attend tutorials. Her teacher told me that Anna performed better on her end-of-the-year TAAS (Texas Academic Assessment Skills) than the other children who qualified for tutorials. I signed the IEP agreeing to the plan.
At the end of the first six weeks of third grade, a parent-teacher meeting was held to discuss her progress. Her grades were B's and C's. Her teacher indicated to me that the only reason they were, was because Anna would typically be given a second chance to take the test. She would then bump her grades up.
"Anna cannot stay on task," she said. "She keeps interrupting herself. The smallest amount of noise in the classroom distracts her. When I tell her to sit down and go over the work, she goes to her seat and looks in her desk or around the classroom. Then she brings her work back to me without having looked it over. On the other hand, if I sit down with her and go through the steps, she is able to do the work. She appears to be displaying characteristics of ADHD (attention deficit hyperactive disorder). If you put her on the medication, her grades would likely improve."
"I guess you did not get a chance to review her psychological report," I said. "She did not meet the ADHD criteria. Receptive Language Deficit means she does not receive language. In other words, she does not understand what you are saying."
"You do not have to have the same type of testing. Your pediatrician can do the evaluation. The testing can be done through the school, but it is a much lengthier process," was her reply.
My child's disability had been explained thoroughly to me. I felt that I pretty much understood it. At this point, I became even more convinced that this language disability was not completely understood.
According to the literature I have read, children with language disability may exhibit behavioral problems such as being disruptive to self and/or others, and they may appear to be inattentive and have problems remembering oral instruction. Generally, their performance is poor in a noisy environment, and they require more time to process information. Academically they have difficulty with reading, comprehension, spelling and vocabulary.
As a concerned parent, I wanted to do what was best for my child. The thought of medicating her bothered me terribly. I knew that stimulants were very effective in treating attention deficit. I was not fully convinced that Anna had ADHD in addition to language disability. At home I could count on her to complete her chores without having to remind her. She frequently offered to help her younger siblings and myself intuitively. I nonetheless went on-line to research the effects of stimulants on children. I was not happy to learn that according to the American Pediatric Association, the medication can affect the growth of children. Anna continues to blossom into a very gifted athlete and is extremely tall for her age. This is an asset and all a part of the gift that she was given. I could in no way take this away from her. I firmly believed that she will need to utilize her athletic gift when selecting a career. The present objective is to find and make available to her the resources that will enable her to overcome her present hurdle.
Through my research I discovered that some physical illnesses and learning disabilities had to be ruled out prior to making an ADHD diagnosis. With this in mind I took her to the pediatrician with the hope that she might reassure me that Anna's problem was related exclusively to language difficulty and not ADHD. I gave the pediatrician a copy of the psychological report which she reviewed. She asked Anna what she thought was going on. Anna shrugged her shoulder indicating she did not know.
The doctor turned to me and asked, "Well what are your thoughts, Mom?"
Trying to get away from making the decision I replied, "Well she does have allergies which have never been treated."
"You have a valid point," she said. "Let’s treat her allergies and see if it will make a difference."
She had been on the allergy medication for several weeks and continued to struggle. Still filled with uncertainty, I started her on stimulants. The stimulants did not change or improve her attention span or her distractibility. I had her re-tested with an independent speech pathologist. The result confirmed the auditory processing difficulty. I shared the test results with her school. New goals were added to her IEP. The school diagnostician had however missed the auditory processing difficulty.
When it became clear that Anna had not made any academic progress in third grade; after her teacher had tutored her for several weeks, another ARD meeting was held. At this meeting it was finally decided that further testing needed to be done. Through this process I realized that the school continued to evaluate her language ability. Her auditory processing skills had never been evaluated by the school. Although some consideration had been given to the documentation I presented, these results were repeatedly over-looked.
Anna knows that I think she is special and that my dream is to one day see her at the Olympics. Presently she needs me to carry the torch for her until she is mentally and physically able to carry it herself.
Parents need to educate themselves about any disability their children may have. A complete psychological assessment helps to rule out the possibility of co-existing disorders. Teacher may not always be accurate in their assessment of their students. It is very important however, for parents to listen to teachers. A child may exhibit behaviors at school that he/she may not exhibit at home. It is absolutely possible for a child to have a language disorder and ADHD. Prior to an ADHD diagnosis the language disorder has to be ruled out. Teachers can make recommendations, but the final decision should be that of a medical professional.
After obtaining the report from the speech pathologist for Anna, I was able to get her the services she needed from the school. The speech pathologist clearly listed Anna’s strengths, weakness and interventions needed to help educate her. We also got her additional speech therapy with this speech pathologist. She was able to have a very successful year. At the end of the year TAAS exams (Texas Assessment of Academic skill) Anna earned an 89% in math and 85% in Reading.
The link below is of Anna's Shot-put performance. She plays on her school's varsity basketball team, She plays golf with the first tee of Houston, holds the Shot-put throwing record for her school and once held the record for the district 400 meters.
Anna's Athletic Ability/ Shot put performance
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