I Promise to Let Go.
On Friday, we drove six hours to drop off our beautiful daughter at Texas ChalleNGe Academy. I was a bit apprehensive. I had made this awful decision because I am so determined to ensure that this child achieve academic success. This school would be a lot different from all the private school she attended in the past. This is like military school, and it will be extremely disciplined and tough.
When we got to the facility, they had the parents stand in a separate line from the cadets. Parents were instructed to go on another line where paper work was reviewed to make sure all was in order. My husband carried my daughter's bag from the car, and while we were on line waiting to enter the building. At the appointed moment, he gave it to her. Students were to carry their own bags. As my husband placed one of the bags on her back, she started to drift backwards.
"I will not be able to carry this," she said.
"You will have to," he told her. "That is what they are instructing us to do. Remember this place is all about following rules."
"I know," She responded. "I guess I will just have to drag it." I am not sure where my attention was, but I did not see her as she made her way across the gymnasium to the female check in desk. Her line appeared to be moving a lot faster than ours. I looked up, and she was gone.
We made our way to about one third of the same gymnasium where we handed in her passport, social security card and medication. We then took a seat in the bleachers where we waited until everyone else was checked in. The director of the program and the principal of the school then addressed the parents and family. They talked about the requirements that they would need in order to graduate in June. That is, not only graduate from the program but from High school or by passing the GED exam.
At the jolly least, I wanted all of my children to finish high school. My actual dream is for them to finish some sort of post-secondary education. From an unusually early age, this child was more interested in socializing but never in academics.
I know that I am not allowing her to assert her self-will by putting her in this place. I promise myself that I will not inflict my desires on her once she turns 18. If she chooses not to continue her education after she finishes this program, then I will back off. What ever choices she makes, the consequences will be hers and hers alone. If her future choices cause her pain, I will feel her pain right along with her. Getting her to succumb to my desires for her is way too difficult.
When we got to the facility, they had the parents stand in a separate line from the cadets. Parents were instructed to go on another line where paper work was reviewed to make sure all was in order. My husband carried my daughter's bag from the car, and while we were on line waiting to enter the building. At the appointed moment, he gave it to her. Students were to carry their own bags. As my husband placed one of the bags on her back, she started to drift backwards.
"I will not be able to carry this," she said.
"You will have to," he told her. "That is what they are instructing us to do. Remember this place is all about following rules."
"I know," She responded. "I guess I will just have to drag it." I am not sure where my attention was, but I did not see her as she made her way across the gymnasium to the female check in desk. Her line appeared to be moving a lot faster than ours. I looked up, and she was gone.
We made our way to about one third of the same gymnasium where we handed in her passport, social security card and medication. We then took a seat in the bleachers where we waited until everyone else was checked in. The director of the program and the principal of the school then addressed the parents and family. They talked about the requirements that they would need in order to graduate in June. That is, not only graduate from the program but from High school or by passing the GED exam.
At the jolly least, I wanted all of my children to finish high school. My actual dream is for them to finish some sort of post-secondary education. From an unusually early age, this child was more interested in socializing but never in academics.
I know that I am not allowing her to assert her self-will by putting her in this place. I promise myself that I will not inflict my desires on her once she turns 18. If she chooses not to continue her education after she finishes this program, then I will back off. What ever choices she makes, the consequences will be hers and hers alone. If her future choices cause her pain, I will feel her pain right along with her. Getting her to succumb to my desires for her is way too difficult.
Comments
Post a Comment