Difficulty in Mothering a Troubled Teen
It was never my desire to be loved or accepted by the masses. I did, however, want to do what I found pleasure in doing. Today I can honestly say that I received no satisfaction out of the actions I have taken in the last few days. Being strong and steadfast is not terribly easy; neither is saving someone from themselves. These are my views in relation to my equally as determined child. I asserted my rights as a mother and probably my knowledge as a medical professional.
After discussing what measures we should take concerning her welfare, my husband and I decided to have a mental health warrant issued so she could be picked up. We quickly realized because she was seventeen that the authorities were not going to infringe on her rights. I reported her as a runaway, the police made no serious effort locating her. If she chose to walk the streets, my impression was that the authorities would leave her alone to do just that, even if she were at risk of endangering herself but not others. As her mother, I was thinking the worse. She does have a mental health history that entails being extremely impulsive and her behavior at times do put her at risk.
My greatest issue with this is that I know my actions can be viewed as being unusually strict. It is not other people’s approval that I seek but for my daughter to be able to make better decisions. I want for her to be able to survive and get what she wants to in life. I know from personal experience how disconcerting not accomplishing one’s goals can be. I also know that happiness comes from within and accepting that this is the way things are. I say this, but that is not at all like me. If I were tolerant, I would not have repeatedly asserted my authority as a parent. If she were making choices that would allow her to strive in life, I would have allowed her to do just that. She, however, was not, and my actions were to protect her.
Becoming a child's hero is not for the faint of heart; it involves getting knocked over a few times, and knocked over I have been. I am not at all happy with what I felt I had to do, but nonetheless I did it. At the present time, my daughter is safe. We place her in a program that is geared towards helping her deal with her issues and with acquiring the skills to make better choices. I know I am not alone when it comes to dealing with a troubled teen. I am also fully aware that there will be others who will have similar struggles as I have. If one person can benefit from my experience, living through it has a lot more value. Personally, whatever's the purpose, it pallor to the distress this has caused me. In my heart, there is no joy or reward in this experience or even blessing that can compensate this. Yet I know that there will come a day when I will forget and even then, I would have lost again. For this would then not have meant anything to even me. Hopefully this was for her sake, and she will not see me as a villain, but more like her advocate, not that being her champion is what I set out to be.
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After discussing what measures we should take concerning her welfare, my husband and I decided to have a mental health warrant issued so she could be picked up. We quickly realized because she was seventeen that the authorities were not going to infringe on her rights. I reported her as a runaway, the police made no serious effort locating her. If she chose to walk the streets, my impression was that the authorities would leave her alone to do just that, even if she were at risk of endangering herself but not others. As her mother, I was thinking the worse. She does have a mental health history that entails being extremely impulsive and her behavior at times do put her at risk.
My greatest issue with this is that I know my actions can be viewed as being unusually strict. It is not other people’s approval that I seek but for my daughter to be able to make better decisions. I want for her to be able to survive and get what she wants to in life. I know from personal experience how disconcerting not accomplishing one’s goals can be. I also know that happiness comes from within and accepting that this is the way things are. I say this, but that is not at all like me. If I were tolerant, I would not have repeatedly asserted my authority as a parent. If she were making choices that would allow her to strive in life, I would have allowed her to do just that. She, however, was not, and my actions were to protect her.
Becoming a child's hero is not for the faint of heart; it involves getting knocked over a few times, and knocked over I have been. I am not at all happy with what I felt I had to do, but nonetheless I did it. At the present time, my daughter is safe. We place her in a program that is geared towards helping her deal with her issues and with acquiring the skills to make better choices. I know I am not alone when it comes to dealing with a troubled teen. I am also fully aware that there will be others who will have similar struggles as I have. If one person can benefit from my experience, living through it has a lot more value. Personally, whatever's the purpose, it pallor to the distress this has caused me. In my heart, there is no joy or reward in this experience or even blessing that can compensate this. Yet I know that there will come a day when I will forget and even then, I would have lost again. For this would then not have meant anything to even me. Hopefully this was for her sake, and she will not see me as a villain, but more like her advocate, not that being her champion is what I set out to be.
Visit ruthspoetry.rahtimes.com/ for more on the Author.
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