Maternal Instinct
I have a particularly strong sense of wanting to protect my children’s privacy but also a need to be safe. This is essentially an immense internal struggle for me. Who in their right mind would put someone's interests before their own? Well I think mothers all around the world does. The most frustrating part is that I am waving this red flag and becoming terribly upset. There are truly capable individual that love me yet, they refrain.
One would think after seeing, watching and interacting with me for many years that my character would have been abundantly evident. I know that I can tell in most cases a wholesome person from observation. I am fully aware that it is better not to involve others in difficult personal issues. I also know that my husband is supposed to be the person who is to take an active role in protecting and supporting me. The reality is, that is not who he is. There are friends who have consistently been there for me, but there is a limit to what they can do.
The bible says that a good name is far more precious that rubies and I sincerely believed that and has lived accordingly. Knowing that I purposefully chose to live the way I have, how can I then sit back and allow others to ruin my reputation? Not only that, I feels that it is unjust for anyone to discredit all my years of giving of myself. If you were in my shoe, would you allow it?
This has been so troubling to me, especially because I place so much importance on this; all I wanted to do is run and hide. The thing is I have nowhere to run to. It also is not fair that I get to give up the things I have worked so hard for. One benefit of my writing is that it enables me to think and come up with a solution. It may not work because my husband will not support me on this and there are some things one cannot do without monetary support. This experience, however, does has its benefits. I know first hand the consequences of trusting the wrong person. With that, it is impertinent that I do not repeat my error again. I feel that I need to apologize at this time to those of you that do not honestly know better. This has been one of the worse time of my life and one I sincerely do not want to forget. I know, as a result, it will cause me to distance myself, but I wanted you to know that it is with the most excellent of reasons. I need to protect myself because obviously no one else will.
Visit ruthspoetry.rahtimes.com/ for more on the Author.
One would think after seeing, watching and interacting with me for many years that my character would have been abundantly evident. I know that I can tell in most cases a wholesome person from observation. I am fully aware that it is better not to involve others in difficult personal issues. I also know that my husband is supposed to be the person who is to take an active role in protecting and supporting me. The reality is, that is not who he is. There are friends who have consistently been there for me, but there is a limit to what they can do.
The bible says that a good name is far more precious that rubies and I sincerely believed that and has lived accordingly. Knowing that I purposefully chose to live the way I have, how can I then sit back and allow others to ruin my reputation? Not only that, I feels that it is unjust for anyone to discredit all my years of giving of myself. If you were in my shoe, would you allow it?
This has been so troubling to me, especially because I place so much importance on this; all I wanted to do is run and hide. The thing is I have nowhere to run to. It also is not fair that I get to give up the things I have worked so hard for. One benefit of my writing is that it enables me to think and come up with a solution. It may not work because my husband will not support me on this and there are some things one cannot do without monetary support. This experience, however, does has its benefits. I know first hand the consequences of trusting the wrong person. With that, it is impertinent that I do not repeat my error again. I feel that I need to apologize at this time to those of you that do not honestly know better. This has been one of the worse time of my life and one I sincerely do not want to forget. I know, as a result, it will cause me to distance myself, but I wanted you to know that it is with the most excellent of reasons. I need to protect myself because obviously no one else will.
Visit ruthspoetry.rahtimes.com/ for more on the Author.
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