It is These that I fear!

It is not death that I fear.
Just no longer desire the partnership,
Of the one, that is responsible for me.
He brought me here, only to reject me.
To deny my very being, that was the worse.
The source of my hurt, my fretfulness.
But now I have this issue looming over me.

Women that bear five children or more.
Are at a significantly lower risk, than I am.
Of ever developing breast cancer.
At the moment, I am at a much higher risk.
For having the kind that is estrogen driven.

If the estrogen is blocked, that will rectify it.
But would cause me to become infertile.
Would no longer be able to bear a child.
Which would be suitable, but that is a problem too.
It would eliminate one risk but give me two.
Would be at risk for heart disease and other medial issues.
The reason, I initially refused, reconsidered my options.

Who and what am I most afraid of ? Not man!
And certainly not death, that would only return me,
To my original state of being, transport me to my home.
I been on my own for a long time, and that needs to change.
Presently, I have both an earthly and heavenly partner.
They have both, however, wounded and refused to help me.
 
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